she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
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