Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
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