So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
