drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize
