So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize