yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
Randomize
