I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize