I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
The struggles of a small town man whore
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
