Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I believe in your delicious
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