i can't believe i had my finger in that
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
