I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
Randomize
