...so i touched it.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Randomize
