Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
The guy in the cage next to me is having phone sex. His girlfriend is in College Library. Why is my life ridiculous.
Randomize
