She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
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