No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
