I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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