Soap is not a condiment
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
