Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize
