in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
