Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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