I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize
