You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Randomize
