we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
