yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Randomize
