I need help removing her.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
