We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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