anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
