There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
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