The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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