You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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