Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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