i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
