i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
