apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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