Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
