Please, let me fuck your mom
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
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