Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
Randomize
