So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
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