I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Randomize
