About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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