I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
