She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
sex in a hospital.. check
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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