I wish I only lived at night.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
should my penis look like a turkey
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Randomize
