Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
