What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Moment of the night: you were impatient while I paid for the tequila shots and proceeded to lick and salt MY hand for me. This is why we're roommates.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
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