Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Randomize
