And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Your cat ate my taco.
. . . I don't have a cat?
It was laying in your bed. Now it's hunting for more tacos.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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