Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
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