it was so cute when you were pretending to have willpower
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
