is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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