I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize